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1. The name's Ho Li Fen but hey, please call me Lifen :) Not in any funny way though, it pisses me off sometimes.
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made me understood I could do whatever I want, as long as it makes me happy ♥ 5. I'm striving in my university now. Trying to find a balance between my future career and my interests. ~~FML, I hate growing up!~~
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Having a hard time.

Saturday, January 23, 2010 @ 1/23/2010 09:51:00 AM

After struggling through all those relationship crap, I think I need a break. So, I decided to (finally) move on. Besides, nothing's gonna come out pretty if I keep on holding on like this. This time, my heart felt really numb.. I felt lifeless inside after having to go through all of this shit and I'm so not liking my current state. I need to pump myself up 'cause I don't wanna look like a wimp. I need to be STRONG! STRONG! STRONG! Though seemingly, my perfect sky had already torn to bits.
College work is getting kinda hard to handle for me to handle :( And with my insides all messed up, it's hard to comprehend with. It's a good thing I don' have to see him everyday now. Maybe I could slowly let all the pain fade away. Otherwise, it'll be hard for me. Hopefully, I'll be heading for a new start eventually. I just need more time before that happens.
Honestly, I'm getting sick and tired of love. It always disappoints me one way or another. I envy the sweet couples. Eventhough they might fight a lil', but they always make up real soon and things always comes around. I envy they have someone to watch out for each other and support each other spiritually, not only because they're a couple but also because they had already developed trust towards each other and just simply got used to the feeling being together with each other.
Valenitine's day lies on the first day of Chinese New Year this year. At least I don't have to go around town and look at paired people walking around. Guess I'll forget bout Valentine's this year, I don't need an extra depression attack.
Let's just hope that things would get better in time for me.

Posted by lifen♔ at 1/23/2010 09:51:00 AM
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